On this, the day of our Nation’s independence — or, as I’m going to remember it: the day Runnin’ Ron Roenicke allowed Kameron Loe to face FOUR CONSECUTIVE LEFT-HANDED BATTERS for no reason other than the paralyzingly stupid: “But he’s my eighth inning guy!” — I, too, am shedding the bonds of tyranny. Or, more accurately in this case, unchecked idiocy.
I’m done, friends. I’m done going to Milwaukee Brewer baseball games until That Moron (as I’m henceforth referring to him) has been sacked and tarred and feathered and rendered incapable of inflicting grievous harm on my favorite baseball team.
I wish it hadn’t come to this, but like America’s greatest (fictional) president, Bill Pullman (or Paxton? I can never keep them straight) in Independence Day, I’m invoking the nuclear option.
Fire this asshole.